Sunday, 5 July 2015

Diary Post #104. Felicity turns 1 year old..

Felicity Rae-Ellen Mortimer. 
7lb 14oz at 12.41pm. 

Dear Diary.. 

On Friday 3rd July 2015 my precious, beautiful, cheeky little ladybug turned 1 year old. I can't actually believe that one whole year has gone by in the blink of an eye since I brought my daughter into the world.. I love her to pieces. 

Thursday night I put my baby girl to bed, & waited until she was settled & sleeping before the fun began of setting all her birthday presents out & putting up her banners & balloons... than ta midnight I went to bed & asif she knew it was her special day, Felicity woke up at 4.30am & stayed awake until her daddy & big brother got up at 7.30am & then we all sat round & watched Joel help his sister open all of her presents & them play with her new toys together.. it was so sweet to watch. I love thir bond. 

After we had spent the morning playing toys & opening presents, Felicity then went to nursery with her brother for the afternoon, I took in a sponge cake & everyone sang happy Birthday & celebrated with Felicity. 

On Saturday we spent the day with the whole family having a BBQ & again celebrating Felicity's birthday... it was an amazing day, Felicity had lots of fun & recived some very pretty new dresses off her aunties & uncles & lots of new bath toys of nanna & granddad. 

Felicity has such a fun day that on our 2 minute walk home from nanna & granddads house, she fell asleep in her pram & I was able to get her inside, take her upstairs, change her for bed & place her comfortably in her cot, all without waking her up... she was one very shattered little lady.

On Sunday we celebrated for one last time, but this time with some of Felicity's friends from nursery & a few of our neighbors.. again it was a lovely day. Felicity was spoilt rotten with lots more presents, cards & party food ;) tonight she has gne to bed one very exhausted little girl from this weekends birthday fun! & I really hope that we have made her proud & that she had thoroughly enjoyed all that we planned especially for her.


Silent Sunday.

Monday, 29 June 2015

Diary post #103. My Ladybug is almost 1.

Dear Diary.. 

I can't believe just how fast this past year has gone.. this time last year I was heavily pregnant awaiting the arrival of my beautiful little girl.. I was booked in for a cesarean section on 7th July & we were all ready & excited.. Then at 39 weeks exactly (03.07.2014) our little diva decided that she'd had enough & she was going to make her apperance.. four days before section day. so on Thursday 3rd July 2014 at 12.41pm after a 10 hour labor, (I wanted to try myself if I went into labor on my own) failed forceps & then a cesarean section, our beautiful little ladybug, Miss Felicity Rae-Ellen Mortimer entered the world weighing a beauttiful & healthy 7lb 14oz.

This Friday we will be celebrating her First Birthday & I couldnt be any prouder of my little ladybug.. she amazes me everyday with everything she does & she has well & truly completed our family. I love you Felicity. Xx 

Thursday, 25 June 2015

Diary Post 102. - A LITTTLE MUSE: Are people too sensitive, or am I really just a cunt?

Dear Diary... 

So just recently, I seem to have accumulated a lot of "haters" on the world of Facebook. A lot of people have said to me, "yeah but they're just insecure, sensitive people behind a screen that love to bitch & spread gossip to help themselves "look" & feel better." so the question I have been pondering is, are they right, or am I really just a cunt?

This past year especially, I have had so many "friends" on Facebook come & go... & its always over something minor & stupid.. people who have been my "so called friend" for years, all of a sudden develop something nasty up their arse & I become Facebook's public enemy number 1. all formed together by mums on a DDR group that enjoy their "spare time" ripping mine & others lives to shreds.. 

so what do I think of this? 
I think they all need to step away from their devices, realize that they are mothers with children that depend on them & that there is more to life than Facebook & bitching.. I have also noticed that it always seems to be single mums who are the worst (in my experience) they all compete with each as to who's life is the worst & who's most badly done too.. so your partners left & now you have to bring up your kids alone! deal with it, its what life gave you, so make of it what you can!

I have actually started to slowly but surely hate Facebook, if it wasn't for the fact that I actually do have some "real life" friends on there & its my only way of keeping in contact, I think I would actually deactivate & never look back... life is way too precious & far too short to be sat on your arse bitching & slagging off people that you've never even met in your life, & probably never will. there is far worse going on in the world.

I know for a fact this post will more than likely end up all over the place, because yano, i'm so "popular"... always someone thinking of me & having my name in their mouth..... 

Haters ey, they're like crickets, they make a lot of noise, you can't see them but you can hear them, & when you walk right by them, they suddenly go quiet. 

Saturday, 20 June 2015

Four top tips when choosing a mattress for your children.

Choosing A Bed For A Little Child.
When that time comes in every parents life where they have to decide on choosing a bed for a little child, it can be a challenging & very trying time to say the least. I remember how hard it was for me to let go of my little one as he was growing up so fast right in front of me. I also knew that this was going to be a very important step that I needed to be focused on if I was going to help my child's body develop. Before you run out & choose just any kids bed, conside some of these important factors.

Allowing The Child To Grow. 

I was so sad as my child was growing up so quickly, & my mind was more concerned about him staying small then focusing on the task at hand. One thing you must consider when shopping for a bed for a little kid is you need to choose the size that will allow them to grow. This bed will be in their room for several years, so you don't want them to outgrow this bed too quickly. Choose a large enough bed that is long enough & low enough to the ground that they can get in & out of easily.

The Firmness Of The Mattress.

These are very important in the development of your child's body. A form mattress will not only support their body, it will allow them to fall asleep faster, rest through the night comfortably, & giv them a refreshed feeling that will allow them to be fully charged the next day. The mattess might be used by your child for ten years, so in addition to the mattresss helping with their bone development, choose a quality mattress that will last for that time without incident. I almost made the mistake of going for the cheapest mattress, which would never handle the abuse my child can dish out in a single day.

The Right Mattress.
Your child is no expert on the type of mattress that they need, but they can offer you valuable input as to which type is more comfortable for them. Plan a fun day out & in between other activites you can shop in the local mattress shop for a few minutes. Let your child lie, sit & bounce around on a few of the kids mattress's. Get some feedback when they finally lie down as to which mattress's feel comfortable & which do not. Once you understand they want a particular style like an innerspring firm mattress, you can shop online for the best deals. Eventually I bought a superb child's 3ft single mattress from Cut Price Mattresses

Wednesday, 10 June 2015

Diary post #101. FINALLY.. My first hair cut after surgery...

Dear Diary.. 

Not many people understood just how much having my hair done yesterday meant to me... as most of you know, 4 months ago I had 3 shunt revisions in the space of 15 days, & I was left with two bald patches on my head were they had revised my right sided shunt twice & then placed a second brand new shunt in on the left side of my head. so I now have two fully functional working shunts! but nevertheless, the thought of having bald patches & hair that grew back looking like shit, has made me extremely self concious.
So yesterday evening, I had my first hair cut since surgery, & although I spent a lot of the time flinching in pain whilst having my hair done & then today I have pretty much spent the entire day in bed feeling sickly with a migraine, which is all due to me having my hair sorted out. it seems that my head is still extremely tender & could be for at least the next few months, I so knew I was going to suffer today, but my god it was so worth it. hopefully with the help of my new higher dose of codiene it should settle the migraines down again in the next few days & at least I am looking half decent again now, it has given me the confidence boost that I so very much needed. 

Monday, 8 June 2015

Diary Post #100. - Hydrocephalus.

Dear Diary... 

I have learnt so much about my vp-shunts & Hydrocephalus since January this year when I needed to have four lots of surgery. I have also made some lovely friends through Hydrocephalus groups & pages on Facebook which I am now apart of, & I can't even begin to explain or comprehend the relief & & how nice it is being able to speak openly to people who "truly" understand how it is & how it feels to live with a vp-shunt.. this of course is no offence to anybody else, but it has helped me a lot just recently, especially over the past few weeks when I have been in & out of Hospital with problems following surgery.

I am slowly on the mend. it could take upto 6-12 months for my brain to be fully recovered from the trauma it has been through, & due to this I suffering terribly at the moment with short term memory loss which is also known as a mild form of dementia, dur to everything my brain has been through. I mean jesus, I know I was a bit of a dumbpass before all of this, but seriously? my memory is ridiculous at the moment. I get so much mixed, up, I forget things 10-15 minutes after I have talking about them, & when I get stressed, I stutter & can't get my words out... which can be extrmetly embarrassing if in the company of people you don't really know & they don't understand. 

Wednesday, 3 June 2015

Diary Post #99. - Felicity is almost one.

Dear Diary... 

I would just like to wish my gorgeous little ladybug�� a happy 11 months. I cannot believe that in just 30 days time, you are going to be 1 year old.. your growing up so fast, & I couldn't be any prouder of you if I tried. I love you so much, my beautiful little girl. 

Friday, 29 May 2015

Diary Post #98. - Hospitals Hospitals Hospitals.

Dear Diary... 

So to say that Wednesday was a long day would be a total understatement. I spent the entire morning in hospital having both of my vp-shunts checked over due to me suffering servere headaches/migraines for the past 2-3 week.. possibly even longer than that to be honest. Thankfully my bloods & ct scan came back okay & revealed that BOTH of my vp-shunts are working exactly as they should be doing, but now I am being referred to an eye specialist so that he can take a look into the back of my eyes to see if he can work out why I keep getting these nasty headaches so frequently.  I mean I know for a fact that it isn't down to me needing some new glasses, as I only had a site test & had new lenses prescribed in March, so an "urgent" appointment has been sent out to the surgeon that did my operations in Jan-Feb & it has been said that if my headaches don't subside or begin to calm down then he may suggest doing a procedure where he places a needle into my vp-shunts to check the pressure.. this I believe is called a "ventriculoperitoneal shunt tap" I haven't had one of these done since I was a baby, so I don't really remember what happens & for the time being whilst I await my appointments with the eye specialist & my neurosurgeon, I have been prescribed stronger pain killers which should hopefully give me some form of relief from these headaches.. 

The doctor that I spoke to on Wednesday also told me that alot of shunted patients tend to suffer with frequent headaches/migraines & that there is actually some form of "life long" medication that they could look into putting me on to help me cope & control the headaches if all else fails which should then hopefully give me a better quality of life as I wouldn't be plagued with headaches & such like I am now, & in all fairness, I would much rather be taking medication for the rest of my life rather than have to live with these horrible & hurrendous headaches everyday, because I am not even joikng when I say that I have practically spent the majority of this last week stuck in bed.

a positive note... 

My beautiful children have been my rock recently (as well as my husband & a lot of other people) but these two beautiful gems are my real reason that I have fought the way I have since January, they are the reason that I fight everyday through this darkness that is depression & conquer my demons, they are the reason that I carry on & keep myself above water, & not let myself sink My beautiful babies are MY LIGHT.